A Weekend of Blah

Well right now, I'm tired, but I always seem to be tired. I wonder why that is?

It's starting to snow, and by the time I leave work today I'm sure it's going to be a mess. It's a good thing that I don't have to take any major roads on my way home, back roads all the way baby!

Well I have nothing exciting to report for this weekend.

Let's see. Friday consisted of us working out, doing some reading and heading off to bed. Saturday, we actually met some new people, and we have dinner plans for next Friday with two other couples. Late Saturday afternoon, the wife wasn't feeling to well so we just hung out at home and watched a few movies on television. Sunday involved another 2 hours of workout, and some house cleaning and laundry.

Wow, how exciting is that. Boy do I lead a fairly boring life.

Let's see, right now at work, I'm just waiting for lunch time to roll around, because I'm heading off with 10-12 other employees out for someones birthday. I haven't been here that long so this will give me a chance to meet more of my college's. We're going for pizza apparently. Mmm, how healthy is that?

My reaction isn't working very well, so in the back of my mind I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do next. Chemistry at my new job here hasn't been co-operating with me, hopefully things will change in the future.

Ah well, that's all I've got for now, I might do another update later today.

Ode to Sammi

Sammi

Okay, so as you can see above, this is my dog Sammi. Today I thought I'd write a little about him. I know you're bored already. Anyway, we got Sammi when he was a year and half old, from a breeder. His previous owners had bought him when he was a puppy and gave him back to the breeder because they said he was aggressive, and they kept him in a muzzle all day long (poor guy). Anyway, we were in the market for a dog and the breeder had Sammi. My wife was a little worried about the aggression, but the breeder assured us that it was just the way the previous owners handled the dog.

So on one fine Saturday morning, we drove up from San Diego to San Fransico to pick up our future family member with a minor interlude for a speeding ticket. We met Sammi Saturday afternoon, headed to the pet store and picked up some things and then we drove back that same night. He was a great dog for that first trip home, he didn't make a sound. He must have been so confused.

The next day, he was in his kennel and my wife reached in to pet him and he snapped at her. At this point she was seriously considering taking him back. I told her that he was probably tired from the long trip and unfamiliar location. After a couple more incidents, we finally managed to teach him that he was not the man of the house, and things have been pretty smooth sailing since.

Sammi is now 3 and half years old, and he's more like a cat than a dog. He loves to lie in sun beams, he doesn't make much noise and he sleeps a lot. But once he's outside he's a crazy dog to say the least. Chasing deer, rabits, squirrels and birds (even flying ones, nobody said he's smart).

Anyway, that is my ode to Sammi. Pretty lame, but at least I did an update right?

Communication Part II

Alrighty, so as I was saying earlier, last year things started getting better. Things were all roses and smiles, and much sex was had by all. But alas, happiness cannot last forever, can it?

Things were going great, my wife had started writing, and taking it very seriously. She was sending out short stories to magazines, and writing articles for other magazines, I was incredibly happy, she was happy, our dog was happy, we were one happy little family. Things were great and the sex was great, but then it all came to a crashing halt when....

She found my collection of downloaded porn.

See, I knew that she wasn't fond of porn, but the one thing that bothered her the most was that I would pressure her into having sex. Again, I never viewed anything that I did as pressure, but that's beside the point. So, I was to not mention/pressure her into sex. So, to take my mind off of sex I started to build up a little porn collection on my computer. I did it in my free time, and it was something for me and me alone. I wasn't addicted to it. I didn't need it. But it was definately something that helped keep me from pressuring her into having sex. Now I was a fairly lazy collector, I pretty much just downloaded anything that I had a good connection too, which of course led me to having a lot of porn variety from VERY hardcore to softcore. Again, I don't think there is anything wrong with me enjoying a little porn now and then in my private time.

Anyway, so she found my collection and our world collapsed. She had viewed some of the files and was disgusted by some of the stuff that she saw. Thinking that I wanted to do those things to her. Which I'll be honest I don't, I have no desire to urinate on someone, or dominate someone or humilate anyone in any way. I did have some of that porn, but that was more because I did mass downloadings and I just didn't delete everything.

Well we had a huge fight. She accused me of lying to her, which was true, because there was a time where she asked me point blank earlier if I was downloading porn and I said no and I was. But, the reason that I lied was because I believed that using porn was something that was to be kept private, something that was mine, not something that was shared. I've been using porn since I was a teenager, and I've always hid that fact from everyone. Probably because it's embarassing and not something you generally discuss.

So, once again she felt betrayed, and she also felt very self concious. She felt that she couldn't compete with the people on the screen. What she doesn't realize, is that she doesn't have to compete with the people on the screen. I couldn't ever make her understand that or understand the reason I use porn.

We fought for a very long time, she actually said she would have prefered if I cheated on her. This totally blew my mind. I couldn't even comprehend it, I still can't to this day. I would have never lumped porn into the same category as cheating, not even close. I tried to explain, but she wouldn't listen, she was hurt, she felt betrayed.

Our life which was going so well, came to a sudden crashing halt. The funny thing is, I was considering deleting the collection, as I had no real need for it anymore seeing that our sex life had been kicked into gear. Strange how life goes.

For two weeks, she wouldn't even let me see her naked. This is my wife who wanders around naked all the time. Desperate for answers, I searched out on womans message boards to see what they had to say about porn and this is what I learned:

• Many women are offended by porn, and it seems to be a subject that has ruined a lot of marriages, usually because the husband is addicted to it.
• Some women are O.K. with it.
• Some women like it and enjoy it.

So after several weeks of living in a horrible relationship, we finally came to a comprimise. My use of porn greatly offended her. I promised not to use porn again, it was not so important to me as to destroy our relationship.

This was nine months ago, and I haven't downloaded or sought out any porn since. I have been tempted from time to time but I have held strong. Does she believe that I haven't, probably not, she still doesn't trust me. But now I'm doing everything in my power to build back up that trust. Boy has it been a long and exhausting road, and this last weekend was definately a step in the wrong direction.

A Weekend to Forget

Well I don't really have much positive to say about this weekend other than. My communication skills are still sucking the big one, and lets just say that's not helping things at home.

Friday:

Alrighty, so Friday night was date night, and it was my turn. This is something that we've just started, to get us both out of the house and doing something. My first date night I took us out to the Trimuph Brewery in Princeton, where we met some new people, had a horrible dinner, and listened to a band.

Well this night, I had found what was supposedly a nice restaurant in Lawernceville and made reservations, and then afterwords I was planning on going to a movie, which is something we haven't done since we've come to New Jersey. Most likely because there isn't anything that either of us really want to see. So I tell her none of my plans, I get home from work and tell her to get ready and dress up nice and I take the dog out for a walk. Then we are on our way to dinner. Let's just say that the restaurant, sucked the big one. We defiantely didn't enjoy it. The food wasn't great, the service wasn't great and the ambiance just wasn't worth the price tag on the meal. Maybe, I'm just not cut out to eat Foo-Foo food as I like to call it.

Anyway, so we head off to the movie theater, when we arrive their is a huge line up (it being Friday night and all) and my wife's knee was still hurting. So, we decide just to head home and maybe watch a movie at home, which turned into us watching T.V. and then going to bed.

Bust.

Saturday:

Saturday, my wife slept in, while I played around on the computer. We finally got our act together around 1:00 PM and went out and hung out with some friends for a few hours and then it was back home for another evening of T.V., then off to bed we go.

Sunday:

Well the plan for Sunday is to go to the gym, my wife's knee is feeling a little bit better, but it's still sore. We head out to the gym to play some squash, things were going well and at some point I faked running into her and hugged her. Well she got really pissed at that. I was just trying to be fun and playful but instead I apparently made her feel like a plaything, or something to that effect. Like I wasn't taking her squash playing seriously, and she was only a little blonde toy or something like that.

Woah, how does me hugging her make her feel like that? I don't think I'll ever understand women. Anyway, we fight in the court for a while. I appologize, several times. I mean I wasn't trying to piss her off, I wasn't trying to do anything that she thought I was. I always have this feeling that no matter what I do I just can never win.

Anyway, we finished the rest of our workout, which left us both very sore and her with a sore wrist and knee. We hadn't eaten anything all day, so we decided to head out and grab something to eat. Once we arrive at said location, and we are standing in line I realize that I had left my wallet at home. See I was wearing these track pants that don't have a back pocket and I left my wallet out because it wasn't comfortable in the front. Anyway, this pisses her off again, but really it's not that far to home. We head home, I grab the wallet and the dog and we head off for dinner, and then we went for a drive.

Anyway, the next day was going to be a holiday and we had plans to meet with some people. They had originally wanted to get together around 10:00, but I had asked if they could bump it up to 10:30, just because we had to drive down there and I didn't want to be late. They said sure no problem. Anyway, I get in shit for asking them to change the time, beacause apparently the world revovles around me and how I don't think of other people.

I can't fathom this. I mean, they wanted to get together at 10:00, and I just asked if they could push it back a half-hour. To me it sounded pretty reasonable, but apparently it would have been reasonable if I had a better excuse for it. The funny thing is, the real reason that I did it was because I know that she doesn't like to get up in the morning, so I wanted to give her some extra time and also, I know that she doesn't like to be late for things, and I just know if we had made it for 10:00 we'd probably be late and that would piss her off. So, in a sense, I was trying to do something nice and all it does is blow up in my face.

Monday:

Wife has trouble sleeping Sunday, only gets a couple of hours sleep and is a little grumpy. We head out to meet up with some people, she's fairly grumpy in the car, which bodes well for the rest of the day. We arrive at the location and it's here that she finds out that we're going to be a little longer than she had originally thought. This pisses her off immensely. She grins and smiles but I know up shit creek without a paddle, once we are out of there.

Now, I knew that we were going to be there longer, and I also thought she knew, but apparently that's not the case. She then accuses me of lying to her, or trying to be sneaky, or withholding information. Which I did not do or try to do. Which I say over and over again, but she is so angry she doesn't want to listen or believe me. It was a miscommunication, I made a mistake and didn't give her all the information. She said if I had, she wouldn't have agreed. We fight, things sort of calm down, we go to the gym. She's still very sore and this makes her very angry, she feels like a gimp. I try to tell her that lots of people hurt themselves doing physical activity, especially when your using muscles that you don't normally use, or you overwork something. She's still disappointed with her self.

Summation:

I'm not sure what the hell I did this weekend, but once again I seem to have derailed the train. I think that there must be something bothering her because she was just far to short about far to many things. I'm not sure what to do, or where to go from here. I'm at the point where I feel that nothing I do is good enough, and that whenever I try to do anything it just blows up in my face. Man this sucks.

I need to find something positive to write about, all this negative shit is depressing.

An Evening to Remember

Well last night started out as a fairly unmemorable evening. My wife wanted to go to the gym even though her legs were sore. So we went and played squash and it turns out that they were a lot more sore than she thought. I think she may have pulled something, or injured something. So after squash we skipped weights and headed out to sports store to buy some shoes and other things. Fairly boring, standard married couple stuff.

So after we get home, we watch the end of the apprentice and I take the dog for a walk. It was cold last night, but I wanted to take the dog for a good walk, so we were gone for about 45 minutes. When I came back home, the wife was sitting naked on the couch watching a show on HBO called real sex. Now I know your thinking "WooHoo", but my wife tends to walk around naked all the time. She sleeps naked, she does a lot of things naked, she's not self concious. But her being naked definately does not mean I'm getting lucky.

So we watch the end of the show, which was about 20 minutes. Basically it was about a person who teaches woman how to pleasure a man both orally and manually. They also mention that the average size of an erect penis is about 5 1/4 inches. Anyway, she brought up that earlier on the show they were talking about Native American sexuality and what they call women and men based on how their genitalia are shaped and positioned. Like if a women's clitoris is close to the vagina she is called a deer, and it is said that she will come quickly, whereas a women who's clitoris is further away is known as a buffalo (not very flattering). Well men had something similar, and my wife said she thought I was a bear.

So, we get ready for bed, and she keeps asking to look at my penis, she wants to see what kind of shape it has. I of course do my best to hide it. Then she asks me if I can get hard so she can see which animal I am. I tell her that if she wants me to get hard that she's going to need to do something to help me along (trust me at this point she really probably didn't have to do much). She says something along the lines of, nah that would be too much work, still being very playful. Then she tells me to go get a ruler so she can measure it. I'm thinking Woah this is so not a good idea. But I tell her that if she helps get me hard, that I'll go get the ruler.

At this point she starts, showing me her body in different poses. "Does you like this?" she said.

Oh god did I ever, but I tried to play it cool. I tried to look away, I tried to concentrate on something else. I wanted to make her work for it. "You'll have to try harder than that," I said. She really didn't, but I wasn't going to pass up the opportunity.

Then she started rubbing her breast up against me. "Does this make you hard?" she said in a soft voice.

"Margret Thatcher on a cold day, Margret Thatcher on a cold day" I began chanting to myself, but I could already feel the blood rushing from my head. It wasn't going to be too much longer now.

Then she began rubbing her butt up against me, against my legs, my hands, my arms. I fought the urge to reach out and grab it. "Hmm, I wonder if this worked" she said as she pulled aside the blanket.

Oh it had worked alright, as much as I tried, I couldn't stop it. It had a mind of it's own.

"Okay, go get the ruler from the other room."

Much to it's dismay, I got up from the bed and began searching the other room for the ruler, I hadn't been searching long when she came in behind me and bushed up beside me. We began searching together, but she exaggerated her movements and any time she had to slightly bend over, she would extend herself, so that I could catch a glance. After a few moments of searching she found the ruler. But in those few moments I had started to soften.

"I'm not hard any more," I said.

She looked at me and then stepped closer so that our groins were rubbing together. "You're not?" she said as she rubbed up against me. She grasped me softly with her hand and placed me between her thighs while we stood there in the computer room. I gasped. "Oh, you like that do you?" she said. I nodded, while she continued to grind me between her legs.

"Looks like you're hard again," she said as she pulled away and then she brought the ruler up to my penis and measured it (I'm not going to reveal the results of that here). I thought for sure that was the end of our fun, and I was o.k. with that. It had been a lot of fun, she was very playful. But after measuring me, she put me back between her thighs. I could feel her wetness. I grasped her butt and began to kiss her neck. She continued to grind me there in the computer room and I continued to moan and gasp. It was so good, but I was forgetting about her. I could feel the wave of pleasure coming over me, but she wouldn't stop and in just a few more moments I was dripping down her legs. I quickly cleaned her up and took her back to the bedroom her legs were still very sore.

I began to slowly caress her body lightly with my fingers, running them down her neck, her chest, her stomach. I then began to run them up her legs from her feet. I began kissing her neck and moving ever so slowly south. My hands returned to her breast and I began to circle them slowly with my fingers, moving every so slowly towards the center, my tongue traced the same path, until I finally took on of her hard nipples in my mouth.

She began stroking me again, and life began to return.

My hands ventured further south, finally venturing between her thighs, where my finger slowly seperated her and then began to lightly circle her pleasure nub. It wasn't long, she was definately horny. She must be a deer I thought to myself.

I continued to lick and suckle her nipples while my hands continued to work. I tried to move my head down her body, but she stopped me with her hands, and I just continued to work. She began to moan and her hips began to move with my hand and finally I felt the waves of pleasure pulsate through her body as her climax took her. I moved my hand away briefly to give her a bit of a respite and slowly rubbed her thighs and legs.

She continued to rub me and I was hard, but I was so focused on her, I wanted to give her more pleasure. My mouth moved back up towards her neck and my hands focused back in on her sweetness. This time it took longer, but her moans and body movements became much more emphasised, she was almost there and then my hand slipped.

Shit I thought, I was almost there. I started back up again, and a few more moments passed as I tried to get back into a rhythm. Again, she was breathing heavy and sighing, her legs were tensing, she began to moan, her hips were in the air and then it hit her. She slammed her ass back to the bed, she moaned again and I could feel the ripples trickle through her body.

We hugged for a moment, I kissed her sweetly, and then we drifted off to sleep.

It was a wonderful evening. Things are getting better, can they be sustained?

Baby Steps

Last night we took our dog to agility classes. He had a great time, this time he was very excited and running around like a mad dog. My wife, however, had hurt herself yesterday at the gym. Her knee was causing her a lot of pain so it was making it difficult for her to direct our dog properly. By the end of the evening she was in an extreme amount of pain.

The weird thing about agility class is a majority of the people there are female and non of their significant others are there watching and cheering on. So, I kind of feel out of place, but I definately want to support my wife and more importantly our dog (he's just so damn cute).

Anyway, so after agility class, we went straight home where I put my wife on the couch, got her a blanket and made her some tea and some snacks. We watched American Idol and then I took the dog out. After I came back, I cleaned up the bath tub and ran her a bath. I let her soak in peace and then off to bed we went. I was almost asleep, when she woke me up and aksed me to get her a drink, which I of course said "No!" At this point she proceeded to try and kick me out of bed, but she was still fairly sore from yesterdays work out. This then led to us wrestling around a bit, her trying to give me wet willies and me just trying to fend her off. I of course eventually got up and got her the drink because I always do. Then it was off to dreamland, and of course morning came far too quickly.

I'm still sexless in New Jersey, but things are getting better. :)

Communication

Okay, so things are going good. We get to San Diego and the first month there is great, we're having a good time, we're in temporary housing. Our search for an apartment isn't too long and were definatetly still having sex. I remember some very hot times in the temporary housing, one time after a trip to Disneyland, we decided to take a dip in the hot tub because it was basically just outside our door (I'll be honest the one thing I miss about San Diego is the Hot tubs, sigh). Now the hot tub isn't completely private, on one side there are apartments and on the other side is a street, there is a fence, but you can see through it. So we start getting a little frisky and then the next thing I know my bathing suit is down and she's straddling me in the hot tub. Wow. Anyway, things were good, there was even a strip tease and a lap dance in there, something that was just amazing.

Anyway, this is what I suspect happened.

Now, I've never had a good relationship with my parents and I'm sure a lot of my problems with communication have a lot to do with my upbringing and seeing my parents relationships. Throw in the fact that I'm male and well, let's just say my communications skills suck the big one. See my learned behavior is to not tell my parents anything. This is mainly because no matter what it is that I've done, it's always wrong to them, or in some way I have slighted them. So, over time I guess I learned just to tell them nothing of my life and just nod and smile when they are talking to me. Not very healthy I know.

Now, my wife just couldn't fathom this. She couldn't understand why I didn't tell my parents things. She and her mother communicated all the time. However, my wife would eventually come to understand why I dealt with my parents the way I did, but that happens a little later.

Here's a few examples of things my parents have done:

I was in University finishing off my Bachelor's degree in Chemistry and living at home at the same time. At this point, I had a girlfriend (I'll tell you more about her later) and I spent a lot of time with her at her place. Mainly because I hated being home. This pissed my mother off. Well something I did at some point pissed her off so she kicked me out of the house, at which point I moved in with the girlfriends family, which then pissed my mother off even more (go figure). She then begged me to come back, but I said no and then she got mad at my girlfriends mother for taking me in. Ack! Anyway, I only spent a month at the girlfriends, just enough time to wrangle up some roomates and strike it out on my own. It was about time I left the nest, but it was really much cheaper living at home and going to school.

I was a horrible child. I always did well in school, never did drugs, never really drank, didn't really hang out with the wrong crowd. Went off to University and continued to do well. Finished my Bachelors degree and then my Masters with very little help from my parents (ie. I'm still paying for my education). Yet it was never enough.

Here's another example:

I got the job offer in San Diego, the money was decent, my now wife was ecstatic and wanted me to go tell my parents. So, we stopped by and I told them.

Me: So I got a job offer in San Diego at a major pharmaceutical company

What you expect from your parents.

Expect: Wow, congratulations!

What my parents said.

Mother: It's really expensive there isn't it.....filled with many other negative comments, asking if my now wife was going with me in a very negative tone, for which we hadn't decided yet.

Anyway, that's just my typical Mother. My father on the other hand is quiet, unless he's been drinking a lot (Which is often, because he's an alcoholic) didn't really say anything, just looked at me in a negative way.

Ah well fuck them, I was happy, I had a good job offer, for good money (more than any previous grad before me) and a woman that I was madly in love with.



ANYWAY, to get back on track. My mother and my wife didn't really get along. My mother was a huge bitch and my wife is as stubborn as hell. She blames me, because I keep things from my mother. Rightly so because I did.

I guess I should mention that I told my parents that I was moving in with a roomate in Calgary and forgot to mention that I was dating her. My fault and the wrong way to build a relationship between my Wife and Mother. But honestly I thought it was for the best at the time. I did tell her later that we were dating, but the damage was done.

Anyway, my wife figured that if I just kept communicating with my mother and telling her things, that everything would work out. Now I can't remember exactly what happened, but at some point I was talking to my mother about my wife. In the end my wife felt that I didn't stick up for her, and she felt betrayed. I wish I could remember exactly what happened because I believe this is the point where things in our relationship took a turn for the worse. See the problem was that we didn't solve the issue at that point, and things just continued to build up from there and well our sexual relationship took a turn for the worse.

See the sex stopped, and all my attempts to start it back up met with dismal failure. My wife had no interest in me sexually because she felt betrayed. Whether, or not this was the case, it was how she felt and it was something that we should have dealt with at the time. Plus, she was starting to become depressed because us both being Canadians, and me the only one with a Visa, she couldn't work. At the begining it was great because she could sleep in, but soon she became bored and depressed. So all of these factors spelled the end of my sex life. :(

I didn't understand why, I was still very attracted to her and wanted to have sexual relations with her all the time, but she wanted none of it. Eventually it came to a point where she wanted absolutely nothing to do with sex, and that the mere mention of it became a negative thing to her. Sex, became a hot topic, one we fought about a lot. One where, even if we did have sex it wasn't that great because she wasn't actually into it, it was like she was finally giving in because I beat her down with pressure.

This went on for a while I think at least a year or more, and I think eventually we finally sat back and examined our relationship. I needed to stop pressuring her about sex (which I didn't believe was pressure but actual desire) and work on other factors in our relationship and she needed to stop resenting em and work on our relationship as well.

Now I'll talk in more depth later, about what I did to stop pressuring her about sex, but we managed to start ourselves back onto a path of fun, playfullness and intamacy and things were good again both in and out of the bedroom. That is until about 8 months ago, but I'll leave that for another time.

Wow I really rambled on here, sorry about that.

A Quickie

Here's just a quick update, I've been meaning to write something all day, but I've been busy with meetings, actually doing work and today I wanted to suprise my wife with some lunch. However, she called and was telling me a story about our fucked up friend, and I had to tell her that I was coming home for lunch, so that I could actually get out of here!

So I went and picked up some lunch, and we had a short lunch, a brief chat and took our dog for a walk. It was nice.

Last night we went back to the gym to torture our bodies some more. We played squash for an hour which is a pretty good work out for my wife, not so much for me because I'm a more experienced player. She is, however, improving every session. Squash can be a great workout when your playing someone of an equivalent or better skill level. After squash it was onto our weight routine, and let me just say as I hit the final arm weight, my arms decided that enough was enough and I wasn't able to finish my second rep. So, let's just say that after working out for two hours we were both exhausted, but made a quick trip to the store to pick up some toothpaste and other odds and ends. Taking the dog for a walk last night was definately painful, and when I finally laid down to sleep I was basically out like a light.

This morning I'm not feeling too bad, I have a little bit of soreness, not too much, but the wife is feeling the burn. Hopefully, she'll feel better this evening, as we have to take our dog to agiltiy classes. He seems to enjoy the agility training, most likely for all the treats he gets, but he's been doing pretty well seeing that he's only been to a couple classes.

Anyway, I'll try and write more later this afternoon.

Still sexless in New Jersey, but things are getting better. So what will I do to screw up this time?

Deep Thoughts By Jack Handy

Let's see where to start.

My wife and I met each other about 4 years ago. There was an instant attraction between us but I don't think we realized that right away. You see, she was married and I was in a relationship (I'll delve more into this later). Both of us were unhappy, she had just married a friend because of something bad that had happened in her past, and I was just settling for my first love because it was easier to do that than to move forward.

About three years ago, it became painfully obvious to me that I had feelings for this woman and I needed to make a choice. I had to either to stop things in their tracks or end the relationship with my girlfriend of 8 years. It was tough, but it had to be done. I ended the relationship, it didn't end well, but at least I was able to do it. I had told my now wife at the time, that I didn't do it for her, but for myself and that I did not expect her to do the same. Besides, she was married and that makes things slightly more complicated. Of course she ended the relationship with her husband and it was much more cordial than my break-up. Strange isn't it?

Anyway, after seperating from her husband, she needed a place to stay, so I moved in with her. Things between us got very hot and very heavy very quickly. Those first months of our relationship we couldn't keep our hands off each other. I was on the top of the world. We rented a two bedroom apartment and the day we signed the lease, we made love on the kitchen counter just after the leasing agent left the room, with the blinds wide open and without a care in the world. Things were great and things actually continued to be great for the next 7-8 months.

How do you keep that fire, that passion going throughout the life of a relationship?

Well during this time I had already finished my Masters and was teaching at the University and working for my ex-supervisor. She had motivated me to start moving on with my life and I started applying for real work and got a job in my field in San Diego. I bought a ring and I took her to the place where we had first kissed, the place where I first knew that my life was going to change (which happened to be a parking lot) and I got down on one knee (it was cold and wet I might add) and asked her to come with me on my journey. Looking back now I should have just asked her to marry me, but I was afraid of marriage for some lame reason. But she said yes, and all was good and happy!

Over the Christmas holidays of 2002 we drove down to San Diego with another couple that were friends. The trip was great, we stopped in Vegas for a couple of days and then in Anahiem for a few days. We had a blast.

We were now headed into our new life and things were looking great, or so I thought....

I'll post more later

Sexless in New Jersey

The jury is in, and Valentines day didn't lead to any forbidden fruit.

However, I did manage to pick up a new video card for my computer, seeing that the movers destroyed my old one. It was raining yesterday, so after work I went home and took the dog for a walk and got soaked, then it was off to our gym to do our fitness evaluation and orientation.

Turns out that I have excellent blood pressure and a resting heart rate and that I'm a fat bastard! Well not really, at 5'10" I weigh in at 173lbs with a body fat of 22%. Last year around this time I weighed in at 188lbs, and I haven't really done a lot of work so I'm guessing that I lost a lot of mucsle mass. But still I'm starting to look pretty hunky! Ideally I'd like to be a buff 170lbs, so I have a lot of work to do! I need to work on getting my shoulders broader and getting washboard abs (pipe dream).

So after the gym we went and had a frosty at Wendy's (mmm healthy) and then it was back home, where my wife chatted with a friend who's having issues, we installed the video card, made sure it worked and I took the dog out again in the rain for his final walk. This time I was soaked from head to toe. Got ready for bed, watched part of a movie and drifted off to sleep.

Not a very exciting Valentines day, but a good day for our relationship or at least I think so. :)

I'll update more later

Valentines Day

Ahh Valentines day, I don't have very many fond memories of you. See, I'm of the opinion that love shouldn't be celebrated on only one day of the year, but throughout the entire year. I do try my best all year long to do little things for my wife. I will buy flowers, cards and teddy bears throughout the year for no reason at all, just because I know she likes them. But this Valentines day I set out to do something for my wife.

Okay, so first I went out an purchased a few cute little teddy bears, and a ring. Nothing special, or expensive, just nice. Then this morning before work, after I took the dog out, I wrote several notes, leading to different locations in the house. The first I placed on the bathroom mirror, hopefully when she gets up the first thing she does is goes to the bathroom! This should then lead her on a merry goose chase throughout the house and outside where she'll find a few teddy bears and then finally the ring in the freezer. I hope in brings a smile to her face.

Would you like something like that? Perhaps next year I can do something even more special.

Note: She found the first Teddy Bear and thought that was it and stopped searching and called me. I sent her back on her way.

Note: She really enjoyed the gifts, and the little hunt. Mission: Success.

The End of a Journey and the New Begining

So I missed work yesterday because I wasn't feeling well. Actually, I wasn't feeling well all weekend. However, I did still manage to get to the gym on both Sunday and Monday. I didn't do a serious work out, but some activity is better than none right? Anyway on with the story...

Day 5

Well day 5 was fairly uneventful. This was going to be our last leg of the journey from Greensbourgh, N.C. to Princeton, N.J. We actually ended up sleeping in a bit longer than we had intended, plus we've lost a total of 3 hours of time now, and finally hit the road at noon. Once again I started out the day driving and my wife went for a nap in the back. You see for some reason she has difficulty sleeping at night, and she doesn't sleep very well when she does get sleep. I personally think that she's a Vampire, she likes to bite to. Maybe I'm on to something.

Anyway, the journey through Virginia, Washington D.C., Delaware and Pennsylvania were relatively uneventful. Finally at 8:00 PM on Monday, January 3rd we had arrived at our final destination. Okay, it took us another 30 minutes to actually find our temporary housing, which actually turned out to be not a bad little apartment in Lawerenceville which was about 15 minutes from my work. The great thing about the temporary housing was that Deer actually would walk by right outside our window. I could also take the dog for a walk, and they would just stare at us for a moment, before running off into the woods. Now, originally I'm from Canada. Calgary, Alberta to be more specific (which is really close to the Canadian Rockies, and some world class skiing resorts) and I've seen a lot of Deer, Bears and other wildlife. But living in a city like Calgary it's very rare to have Deer in your backyard. Also, living in San Diego, well the most likely thing you'll have in your backyard is probably some fleeing Mexican. So for me this was very cool. Our dog loved his new home, so many animal smells from the Deer to Squirrels to Birds, he was in doggie heaven.

So, when you move to a new place, everything is new and exciting and sometimes intimidating. But moving from California to New Jersey was like moving to a different planet. You could smell the Unions influence on the state and it reeked. See when we moved from Calgary to San Diego, things were different (mainly the weather), but most things were the same. San Diego had most of the same stores and food places. Even the grocery stores were the same, they had the same owner just different names. We were big Safeway shoppers in Calgary, and once we found Vons in California we were home (Safeway owns Vons). The only thing I missed about Canada, were friends, Ketchup Potatoe Chips and Coffee Crisp Chocolate bars. By the way AMERICAN chocolate SUCKS!!! ARGH!!!

Okay, so now we're here in New Jersey and the first thing we notice, mainly because we missed our turn off was that you can't turn left. What the hell kind of place is this, I mean really no left turns? In California, it's legal to make U-turns, so it's really easy to get back on track if you miss your turn (this is necessary because the signs in California suck as well as the lighting at night). Anyway, later we found many places where you can make left turns and learned all about the "All turns in right lane" dealy. Okay, not a big deal.

Okay, I've rambled on for long enough, time to go do some work.

I'll be back

Inspirationless

I've been meaning to update this for days, but I just haven't had any inspiration. Right now, I'm at work and I'm not feeling particularly well. My throat is a little sore, I have a bit of a cough and I feel kind of achy.

Day 2 Continued

To make a long story short, we pulled over at the next rest stop, and pulled sort out of the way of traffic. The rest stop was fairly busy with a lot of truckers, but we just turned off the lights, hopped into the back seat and began removing clothing. It was fast, furious and fun and then we were back on the road again.

We spent the night in another fairly cheap hotel, and got into a fight about my communication skills. This is a fight that just seems to keep coming up over and over again. I'm horrible at communicating my feelings and I can't really explain why. But I'm not just horrible at talking about feelings, I'm horrible about communicating all things. However, I am actively trying to be better about it. I'm actively trying to be better about a lot of things in our relationship.

Day 3

The next day I started out driving again, and my wife napped in the back for awhile, the day was fairly uneventful and we stopped in Mephis for the night. I went out and got us some dinner and my wife just stayed at the hotel with the dog. Let's just say that when fast food takes 45 minutes to get it's no longer FAST food. I was very tired from driving most of the day and fell asleep while we were watching T.V.

A few hours later I was awoken by my wife rubbing her body up against mine. I was lying on my side and she was rubbing up against me, placing my manhood between her cheeks and slowly massaging me with her backside. Needless to say I was aroused immediately, but as soon as I tried to touch her, she would stop and move away. She would continue to tease me, showing me her breasts and backside but not allowing me to touch. I don't know how long this went on but finally I broke through her defenses and my hands were navigating her body and my lips were brushing her neck and ears. I was incredibly arroused and I could tell that she was too. I wanted her so badly, but I had to control myself. I was gently caressing her with my hand until I could feel the waves of pleasure reverberate through her body and then she was pulling me onto her. We were both sweating and breathing heavily and when it was all over we cuddled for the rest of the evening.

Day 4

Was relatively uneventful until we were about 30 minutes away from where we were going to stop for the evening. We were in North Carolina, my wife was driving in the right lane, we were chatting about something and we passed by a State Trooper that was on the side of the road with his lights on. We thought nothing of it and then all of a sudden the cop car comes zooming up behind us with his lights on. Now, my wife has done a whole lot of speeding in her life, to the point that when she was younger she had her licsence suspended, but I looked at the spedometer and we were going the speed limit. So we pull the car over, each looking at the other trying to figure out what we had done wrong. The trooper walks up to the passenger side door and asks:

Trooper: Do you know why I pulled you over.
Wife: No

A car passes by us in the right lane.

Trooper: Well in North Caroline if a police car is pulled over to the side of the road, you need to change lanes, we've had too many troopers hit by traffic, it's common sense.
Wife: Well it's not that way in California.

Another two cars passes by in the right lane.

Trooper: What they don't have common sense in California?
Wife: Uh, sure

Another three cars pass by in the right lane.

Trooper: Well seeing that your from out of state, I'll not give you a ticket this time, have a good evening.
Wife: Okay

We pull out and head on our way, and while the officer is still off to the side of the road with his lights on, three or four more cars pass by in the right lane. Apparently not very many people know this law. Also we asked the people at the Inn in Greensborough and they had no clue about the law. Very nice people at the Inn by the way, we had an enjoyable stay there. So we actually stayed in Two Drury Inns on our way across the country and they were great, not to expensive and fairly nice. I highly reccommend them to anyone.

Anyway, I'll continue this later...